Hey friends š Have you ever left work feeling drained, unappreciated, and like you gave everything⦠for nothing in return? Yeah, me too. š®āšØ That's when I realizedāI was being emotionally manipulated at work.
It's called workplace PUA (Pick-Up Artist) behavior, and it's way more common than we think.
Let me share what I've been through and what I've learned, so you won't end up being the "go-to helper" who gets all the tasks⦠but none of the credit. š«
It's when someone in the workplaceāoften a boss or colleagueāuses emotional tricks to control, guilt-trip, or take advantage of you. You might hear things like:
⢠"You're the only one I can count on."
⢠"If you really care about the team, you'll do this."
⢠"Don't be so sensitive. It's just a joke."
At first, it feels like you're being valued. But over time, you're just being usedāand left exhausted. š©
Here's what I personally noticed before I decided to draw the line:
1. Always doing extra work while others chill.
2. Getting guilted if I said "no" to anything.
3. Being told I was "too emotional" when I brought up issues.
4. Feeling scared to take breaks or leave on time.
5. Constantly needing to "prove" myself to be seen.
If this sounds familiar, you're not overreacting. You're being emotionally manipulated, not "just a good teammate."
PUA-style manipulation thrives in toxic workplaces. People in power often prey on those of us who are:
⢠Eager to help
⢠Afraid of conflict
⢠Hoping for recognition
It's not your fault if you've fallen into this trap. I did too. But now that we can name it, we can start breaking out of it.
Here's what worked for me, step by step:
ā Start saying "no" without over-explaining. You don't owe anyone your evenings.
ā Write things down. Keep records of requests and your responsesājust in case.
ā Talk to someone neutral. HR, a mentor, or even a friend outside the company.
ā Set quiet boundaries. Like turning off notifications after work hours.
ā Remind yourself: Your worth isn't based on how much you can give to a job.
You're not weak. You're not being "too much." You're just waking up to something that's been draining your energy for way too long.
If this post feels like it's talking about you, that's because I was once where you are. š¬ Let me know in the commentsāhave you ever felt used at work, but couldn't put it into words until now?
Let's share our stories and build each other up. We deserve to feel safe, seen, and respected in our workplace. šŖāØ
You've got this, and I'm cheering you on. š§”